The GayWeddingGear.com Blog

April 19, 2013

Do You Invite People Who Voted Against Gay Marriage to Your Wedding?

One thing that constantly bugs me about getting married and helping other people plan their gay weddings is what to do about inviting people who voted against gay marriage to your wedding.  I have family members, including one who helped raise me, that I love and that is part of my life who voted against it.  If I get married and he isn’t invited, he would be hurt more than anything.  At the same time, he voted for me not to have the right to get married, what do you do?  Here are a few other examples and how I handle them.  You’ll need to make your own decisions and I would love your comments and feedback below.

Do you invite family members who voted against gay marriage to your gay wedding?

Trying to figure out if you should invite family members who voted against gay marriage to your gay wedding is one of the hardest ones to figure out.  Yes, they tried to stop you from marrying the person you love, but if you care about them and they care about you, your wedding won’t be the same without them.  When I’m talking to other people, here is what I go over with them and what I’ll have to think about with my own wedding.

  1. Can the person behave and be ok with gay people around, you kissing your partner and sitting through something they are/were opposed to?
  2. Could seeing an actual gay wedding help them to understand that there is nothing wrong with gay people getting married and that their opinion was flawed or incorrect?
  3. Is their Husband or Wife pro gay marriage and will it effect his or her ability to come?  Will they be offended or be put in an awkward position if both aren’t invited?
  4. Can you honestly be happy with yourself knowing someone you love, that’s in your family and that helped raise you is not invited to the most important day of your life?
  5. Are you going to feel like something is missing because you didn’t invite them in your wedding photos when you see they aren’t there?  Even if they say no, at least you tried and may not feel as bad.
  6. If they say no and do not come, will it effect your opinion of them and can that feeling of rejection be repaired?  This goes two ways.

Trying to figure out if you should invited family members who voted against gay marriage to a gay wedding is a hard thing to do.  I would personally invite them knowing that I did the right thing.  If they say no, it will hurt at first, but at least I already somewhat knew the answer before hand.  At the same time, they may surprise you and say yes because they do love you.

Do You Invite Friends Who Voted Against Gay Marriage to a Gay Wedding?

This one is a bit easier for me.  I have a couple of friends who I met through work that I enjoy and really care about.  They are supportive in my relationships and are always welcoming when they have met my boyfriends in the past.  However, when it comes to voting for gay marriage, their religion stops them from voting for it.  They believe in equal rights but not being able to get married or being recognized by the church.  Although I care about them and enjoy them, I would not invite them because they can’t get past the real issue which is equal rights.  For them its about religion and although they would show up and be supportive and friendly, it would also cause them to feel awkward.  At the same time, going to a gay wedding for a friend that they have known for a long time could actually help to change their minds on gay marriage.  Unfortunately, this can also create another issue.  It is expensive to have more guests at a wedding.

Who do you invite to a gay wedding, friends you’ve known for a long time or friends who support gay marriage?

In the example above, I have known these people for years and love them.  At the same time I have friends who I have known for less of a period of time, am not as close to, but they do support gay marriage, are becoming good friends and would not feel awkward at the wedding.  They would enjoy it, bring in a positive attitude the entire time and nothing would be weird.  Who do you invite, the friends you were/are closer to and have known for a long time or the friends which you have that you haven’t known as long but support your wedding and would also enjoy it without feeling awkward.  I am always stuck with this one.

The more people you have the more money it costs.  Do you risk having people feel awkward and ruining other people’s times at your wedding, and also risk hurting their feelings or do you bring people who would enjoy everything at your wedding and have an amazing time.  You want the people you care about there, but you don’t want any negativity or awkward emotions or feelings at your wedding.  I usually try to figure out what the odds are of the people who voted against gay marriage showing up and then wait to see.  If they are out of town you can ask them first if they would want to come, and if they are local to you just ask.  If they sound awkward at all about it on the phone, then you have your answer and let them know that they sound like they aren’t 100% sure so maybe it’s not a good idea.  Make sure you also let them know you still care about them and aren’t offended that they couldn’t make it.  If they get excited about the wedding and say yes, then send them an invitation and hope they are still that excited when they get to your wedding.  You’ll have to make that decision based on their reactions.

You have to remember that at weddings you have alcohol and things that could end up making someone who was opposed to gay marriage have an outburst, especially if they’re drunk.  If you have people there who are opposed to gay marriage, even though they love you, they could also ruin the wedding for other guests.  It is a really odd thing to not invite someone you love or care about, but you also have to remember that it is your big day and something you don’t want any negativity at.  Please feel free to leave a comment below with your own opinions and what you would do or if you are married what you did do.  Please also feel free to share this post on Facebook and Twitter to see what other people think.

January 30, 2011

Have You Ever Wondered Why You’re Single. Try Honesty!

Filed under: gay dating,Gay Marriage,MyPartner.com — rollerbladerdc @ 11:43 pm

Valentine’s day is coming up soon and everyone is starting to go crazy trying to find a date.  Lots of people are questioning why they are single and not everyone really realizes why they are alone.  The truth is that sometimes you need to sit back and really be honest with yourself.  Maybe you are not perfect and maybe there are a few things you could change about yourself or your habits.  I’m not saying that you need to change to have someone fall in love with you, they should love you for who you are, but you need to sit back and really evaluate how serious you are about finding love.  Here are five things you should think about and seriously consider if they are things that you should work on. It’s all about honesty and the most important person to be honest with is yourself.

1.  Are You Serious About Finding a Relationship?  This may sound like a stupid question, but the reality is are you actually looking to fall in love?  If so for how long?  Do you have accounts on Manhunt, Adam4Adam, Grinder and other Hookup sites?  If you do and you are heading there for hookups, you probably aren’t in the right mindset for finding love.  Regardless of whatever excuse you use like you go to chat with friends, you still have the account on hookup sites and apps.   How is it going to look to the person you want to be in a serious relationship with as well?  It will always be in the back of their minds that you have those accounts and that you could be using them.  If you seriously want to find love and you meet the person you think you are in love with, those accounts won’t mean anything.  If the people in there are your friends you can chat on IM or call them on the phone.  True love doesn’t involve hookup sites or even accounts on them.  The only person you think about is your partner.

2.  Are You Honest About Your Interests?  We all love to say that we like to walk on the beach or enjoy a romantic dinner.  Some people say they love to watch a game, but the reality is most of us don’t.  Suppose you meet someone and they liked you because you like Rock Climbing or the outdoors, guess what, if you don’t then when they want to go camping and you want to head to a broadway show, you’re going to have a problem.  If you don’t like the outdoors, don’t pretend to or say you do.  Be honest about your interests.  I was dating a Rugby player and he always wanted me to go to his games.  I said I was into sports and it was miserable.

I went to support him but I hated it.  I could have spent my Saturdays doing something more productive like drinking in a bar or killing myself.  Both sound like better options than sitting through 4 hours of rugby games.  I should have never said I thought it was cool.  Some people can learn to like it but make sure you are honest about what you really like.  Maybe you’ll find the person that loves those things and can introduce you to other similar things.

3.  Are You Looking For a Life Partner or a Year Long Lover?  It’s ok to not be ready for a life time commitment but to want a long term relationship to share parts of your life with.  If you’re goal is to fall in love but not have to marry, realize that and don’t pretend like it may last forever.  If it ends up being a life long relationship that is great, but if you don’t think it will be for your life, don’t try and fool yourself and your boyfriend or girlfriend into thinking it is meant to be.

4.  Are You Really a Top?  This sounds funny but if you lie about what you like in the bedroom, you may find yourself straying from the person you love.  If you’re a bottom but want to pretend to top, don’t pretend.  If you like S&M, when the time is right don’t be afraid to ask if they are ok with trying it.  The reality is that everyone likes certain things.  If your needs aren’t being met by your partner then you stray.  Look at all the straight men and women who cheat.  Look at all the couples that break up over finding their partner at a fetish bar.  If your partner loves you then they may try it because they’ll know you have certain needs.  Even if they save it for anniversaries then it is still them making the effort.

5.  Where Do You See Your Life And Home Life In The Future?   Kids and the suburbs are definitely something many people want.  Other people want a life without kids and in a condo in the city.  Are you willing to sacrifice where and how you want to live for your partner?  If your partner has always dreamed of having a cabin in the country with noone around and you hate wildlife, you may have a problem.  The city is great when you are younger but if you never want to leave and your partner has dreamed about a white picket fence in the suburbs, that could be the thing that ends your relationship and prevents you from meeting the person who would have liked to live where you wanted to live.  If your relationship gets serious, you may want to have the talk about kids, where you want to live and where you guys see each other in ten years or when you get older.

Many people go and say things that they think the other person would want to hear on a date.  The reality is that not being honest or not letting the person you want to fall in love with know what is really important to you is what could be the end of your relationship.  Be honest in your profiles online and you don’t have to pretend to like things like a museum if you hate them.  If you’re honest and the person you are dating is honest too, you may find that the relationship could work better.  Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

September 17, 2010

The Difference between Gay Weddings and Straight Weddings is Emotions.

Visit the Gay Wedding Gear Gay Wedding Shop Here.

There has to be a large difference between gay weddings and heterosexual marriages and if that’s the case, what is the difference?

To be honest that there is not a large difference between a gay wedding and a straight wedding. It is in the feelings powering the wedding. Regardless of wherever you go, if there is a gay wedding or a very heavily publicized gay wedding, there will be emotional baggage and not just good or happy, but a huge mix of emotions.

A wedding ceremony is a wedding ceremony. You have a happy set of lovers, friends and family members, a wedding band, cake and someone to bless their marriage. You have 2 individuals that firm up their passion for each other and declare that they will be alongside one another no matter what happens. Weddings are amazing and romantic and full of emotion. The family and friends cry, the happy couple, the brides and bride or the groom and groom are nervous, joyful and excited to begin their lives together and for the lgbt community it means a lot more than it does to the straight community for the reason that until recently, gays were not allowed to get married.

Due to the fact that gays were not allowed to get married, they were not able to have equal rights. They were not able to pay a visit to each other if one of them would end up in the hospital, get parental rights, have rights to the income and live the life that they built with their significant other if one passes away, etc… It was a horrible way to live understanding that if anything happened to the person you loved and spent your life with you could do nothing to help them and not even get to be there with their life partner if they would end up in the hospital or on their death bed. It was an absolutely horrible way to live and for that reason when certain States and the District of Columbia approved gay marriage making it legal, lgbt couples flocked to those states and to Washington DC.

Not only did the gay weddings bring in a nice economic burst for the states and for Washington DC, but gay marriage also brought a feeling of joy and celebration. When you have a community that was kept down for so long and then they are provided freedoms and equal rights, especially ones that involve one of the strongest emotions, love, then when they can finally have those same legal rights that everyone else had, the feeling is a lot more meaningful. A lot of women felt it when they got the right to vote, African American people felt it when they were freed from slavery and gay people are starting to get that same feeling of equality as gay marriage has become legal. That is why there is an extra sense of emotion and also tension when you are at a gay wedding ceremony vs. a straight wedding. It is the celebration not only of love, but also of equality. You do have to bear in mind that I mentioned there were mixed feelings as well.

You’ve still got many States and Commonwealth’s that do not allow gay marriage. There are also a ton of faith based groups that oppose gay marriage too because they think that god hates or discriminates against gays. The truth is that God is supposed to love everyone and make them in his/her own image. If this may be the case, why would he/she despise gays? Because of this unknown reason for loathing a community that never really did anything wrong, these religious groups create protests outside of some gay marriage ceremonies.

These types of protestors stand there with their posters and shout at the individuals who are going in to the gay wedding ceremony. Not only is it offensive but how would they like it if other people showed up and shouted over their ceremonies while they were getting married? The thing is that although gay men and women and gay couples are used to this sort of treatment, heterosexual people usually are not and they sometimes get upset by it. They may lash out at the protestors and they may yell back at them. The thing that they need to keep in mind is that this day isn’t about the protestors, it is about the happy couple and honoring them. If they don’t respond to the protestors and they proceed to feel happy and send out good feelings to the couple getting married, the protestors at some point give up and the only emotion you feel in the building is love and that is the most important and one of the most powerful ones out there.

I was looking at a few websites about gay weddings and they inspired me to write a post about what the actual difference between a gay wedding and a heterosexual wedding ceremony actually is. For me it is about the emotions involved in the two. Each are about love but one is also about the celebration of freedom and equal rights and to watch a couple or the Mother and Father of a couple who had to watch as their Son or Daughter that wasn’t able to marry one another be given the equal rights and be allowed to get married. Because of the equal rights, the emotions run even higher at a gay wedding and reception than they would at a traditional straight wedding ceremony.

May 22, 2010

Two grooms Kissing Two Brides Kissing Cake Toppers

Filed under: Gay Marriage,wedding supplies — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 12:24 pm

This wedding cake topper reveals true emotion as this newly wed couple lovingly embrace . Hand painted with attention to every detail, including small 14K gold wedding bands. This exquisite wedding cake topper is sure to become a wonderful keepsake commemorating your union. Made of fine porcelain. Measures 6″ tall and 2.5″ wide at the base.

This beautiful wedding cake topper reveals true emotion as this newly wed couple lovingly embraces. Hand painted with attention to every detail, including small Swarovski crystal wedding bands, and hair accents. This exquisite wedding cake topper is sure to become a wonderful keepsake commemorating your union. Made of fine porcelain. Measures 5.5″ tall and 2.75″ wide at the base.

I did a post about gay cake toppers a long time ago and pointed you all into my gay wedding shop.  However I mainly featured separates because in the past two grooms cake toppers and two brides cake toppers were all about them standing next to each other and sometimes holding hands.  For me that was boring so I recommended that everyone actually use separates to design their own custom cake toppers for their gay wedding so that it properly represented them and their personalities.

Anyways, before that post I had seen a ton of different actual gay cake toppers for two brides and two grooms, but at the same time none of them ever really stood out to me.  Gay people can now get married legally in a bunch of states in the USA and there are a ton of wedding vendors that are catering to gay weddings, but at the same time they constantly forget to create as many fun two brides cake toppers and two grooms cake toppers as straight couples.  When I came across the two brides cake toppers and two grooms cake toppers above I had to share them.

Not only am I in kind of a sappy mood lately but the two grooms kissing cake toppers and two brides kissing cake toppers just really stood out to me.  Not only does it show that gay marriage is progressing and becoming more main stream and accepted, but to show two grooms kissing cake toppers and to have two brides kissing cake toppers shows that the wedding vendors are catching on that gay couples don’t want to have to use cake separates, they want to have a selection of cake toppers just like straight couples and now the wedding vendors are listening.  The two grooms kissing cake toppers and two brides kissing cake toppers are amazingly romantic and absolutely stunning and show that we now have the vendors starting to create the perfect wedding accessories that we want and need.  Not only do we no longer have to use cake topper separates for our own weddings, but we also are beginning to have a much larger selection of wedding cake toppers and not separates for our weddings and these romantic cake toppers are absolutely fabulous and I love them.  The kissing brides and kissing grooms cake toppers are absolutely romantic and they really stood out to me and I highly recommend them for the couple that is in love.   If you would like to buy either the kissing grooms cake topper or the kissing brides cake topper I highly recommend you click on the links above and buy them from the store myspiritualwedding.com.

April 23, 2010

Why gays should not be allowed to get married

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 2:48 am

Like my friend Greg said on Facebook earlier…an old one but a good.  This guy sums up why gay people should not be able to get married or be able to have any rights.  No need to comment but feel free to retweet by clicking on the green retweet button to all of your twitter followers. Thanks.

March 7, 2010

Doing the ring thing in DC

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 12:08 am

So it was no surprise when we reported that gay Marriage and Gay Weddings were made legal here in the District of Columbia. Washington DC has almost always been a pretty liberal and progressive region of the United States. You get a ton of people moving here because of beliefs or ideas and those are usually pretty emotional and strong willed people and most of the time are opposed to something like fur, war, oppression, etc… so when you get a huge group of them together and they are mostly liberal. Then they all decide to actually move here and stay here, well not all but some of them are able to make it here, it isn’t actually a wonder that Gay Marriage was passed here in Washington, DC, it is more shocking that it took that long to pass gay marriage.

So anyways, even though I am not going to go on and on about gay Marriage being legal now in DC, mainly because I don’t think it is anything that is newsworthy since it was completely expected, I did want to congratulate all of the couples that were able to get their marriage licenses from the court house in downtown DC this past week and wish them all a fruitful and happy life.

For those of you wondering, Gay Marriage isn’t about being called marriage or married or even god or ruining religion for you, it is actually about protection and equal rights to health insurance, life insurance, death rights, parenting rights, social benefits, tax benefits, being recognized as a couple, hospital visitation rights, etc… Sure there is a ton of discrimination left in this world, but getting the right to marry and having the licenses actually handed out is a huge step forward.

December 19, 2009

Gay Marriage is Now Legal In Washington DC, or at least everyone is saying it is.

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 11:37 pm

I was at a party last night and some of my friends there started to make a toast.  The entire room got quiet and they announced that the mayor of Washington DC or some lawmaker signed a bill into action yesterday that would legalize gay marriage in Washington DC.

Now, I don’t know if it is true or not that Gay Marriage is now legal in Washington DC, but it isn’t really surprising that gay marriage would pass in Washington DC because of how liberal it is as a city and that it is probably one of the largest gay cities or has one of the largest gay populations in the US.  Not to mention that most of the politicians for VA, MD and DC are always in the Pride Parades, visit the gay bars during election time and also support the gay community, both Republican and Democrat so when it is time to vote on gay marriage or not, chances are they will all say yes and the population of Washington DC will more than likely also vote yes for gay marriage.

It would be pretty cool to see the first gay wedding on the white house, or in front of the monuments or even on Captiol Hill and actually have it be a legally recognized marriage.  Gays get married all the time in Washignton DC and if the rumor that it is now legal is true, it would be a great way to attract more tourists and even more gay couples, especially since DC is an extremely gay friendly city and has a ton of amazing places for weddings.

You wouldn’t think about it normally as a wedding destination, but think about what we have that most other cities don’t.

We have tons of museums like the Smithsonians, we have some of the most recognizable landmarks in the world like the memorials and monuments, we have stadiums and professional sports teams, we also have some amazing restaurants on the water front and even the Kennedy Center and historical theatres like Fords Theatre where Abraham Lincoln was shot.

There are so many amazing places in Washington DC to get married and have amazing looking wedding pictures with historic buildings behind you and if the mayor did sign the bill making gay marriage legal in Washington DC, then you should definitely at least consider it for your gay wedding or for your friends who are looking at where to go to get married.

Remember, this is still only a rumor since I have not seen anything to back it up or the actual law itself, but if it is true, I know gay marriage is definitely going to be voted on soon, then that is another great step towards a more equal United States and even more reason for you to come visit Washington DC and also plan to have your wedding in Washington DC.  I’ll definitely keep you all updated if I hear any more on whether or not Gay Marriage is now Legal in Washington DC.

November 27, 2009

Do Jews allow gays to get married? Is Gay Marriage ok for Jews?

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 10:50 pm

The Jewish religion allows gay marriage for gay men only.  It doesn’t matter what Rabbi or Synagogue you go to, they will all agree on one thing, they cannot legitimately marry two women.  Seriously, no self respecting Rabbi can support the eating of unkosher foods and as we all know, shellfish falls into that category….j/k.   Sorry I had to do that, I thought of that while I was writing this entry.

Gay Marriage is actually ok for just about every religion, however within the Jewish Community and in Judiasm, it is actually a lot more gay friendly than most other religions.  I have read through the torah numerous times and talked to tons of Rabbis and the one thing they all have in common is that none of them have a problem with gays or marrying gays and if you do find a Rabbi that will not marry gay people, then it is because that Rabbi just doesn’t like gay people.

Every Rabbi I spoke to from Reformed to Conservative and even the Orthadox Rabbis all agreed that even if they don’t approve of gay people, they are happy to marry them since there is nothing in the Torah or Jewish teachings that actually say being gay is bad or against god.

Although I am still not a fan of having to be religious, it was really cool to find out that a major and very ancient religion can actually be open minded and actually doesn’t add random things in later on to keep up with social issues and trends and actually doesn’t discriminate…now, there are plenty of things I don’t agree with with every religion, but I do give the Jews credit for one thing that you won’t find with many other religions that changed in modern times, they never banned or preteneded that being gay was evil and I am happy to say that the Jews love the gays and we should love them back.

If you are a Jew or your partner is, good news, you probably will not be going to hell if you get married since there is nothing in the Jewish religion that says gay people cannot get married.

November 21, 2009

Texas Banned All Mariage – Why not make divorce illegal too?

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , — rollerbladerdc @ 12:57 pm

So this week Texas actually banned marriage.  Not gay marriage, not straight marriage, all marriage together.  You might think this is crazy but it actually happened.  Someone told me this last night when I was out with my friends and I just started to laugh but didn’t believe it until I did a search and found it on a million different sites including cbs, the week and some others.

So here is what happened.  In 2005 there was a vote and a law passed to try to ban and abolish gay marriage in Texas.  No surprise there.  Texas is one of the most conservative states in the US.  The issue is that they also ended up including this sentence in their clause or in the bill or law “”This state or a political subdivision of this state may not create or recognize any legal status identical or similar to marriage.”

So what ended up happening is that Democratic Texas Attorney General candidate Barbara Ann Radnofsky found this clause and decided to use it to get some political ground for her running for the Texas Attorney General campaign.  Not only is that a briliant move on her part because she now can get liberal and democratic voters, even a bunch of Republicans to now get to the polls and more importantly start to actually read and understand what they are voting for and not just listening to this will do this, but actually read through it and pass laws more carefully.   You always hear people bitching about politicians not listening to them and passing unfair laws that they don’t like, but in reality if you look at it, we are the people that vote them into office and if we don’t like what they do, we have the choice to not vote for them again.  You cannot always vote because you recgnize the name of the person or because you read a part of the law that you agree with.  You need to vote based on the laws they voted for in the past and actually read the entire bill before you pass or decline it or things like accidently banning marriage in texas happen more and more often.

So something else that I thought was funny was that someone at the bar last night also said, why not just ban divorce since the Texans and a ton of the conservatives are saying that gay marriage ruins the sanctity of straight marriage and the term.  That is actually a seriously stupid idea.

If we banned divorce, what would I have to read about in the papers?  No more Brad and Angelina vs. Jennifer Aniston, no more Britney Spears white trash weddings and worse break ups and even worse, do you know how many murders there would be from the gold diggers who marry them old if they don’t die and are waiting to get divorced to collect a large divorce settlement.  I mean seriously, half the married couples would probably kill each other if they didn’t have an escape clause and tabloids would go out of business.   Not to mention that STD rates and adultry or cheating husbands and wives would probably increase since they would be stuck with the same person for years.  It’s kind of like in England years ago when Kings had their Wives dissapear because they couldn’t actually get divorced or give them a son.  It’s a scary thought so I am actually opposed to banning Divorce but do this it is funny that Texas banned all marriage.

Anyways, just wanted to give you all my thoughts on this and think it is absolutely hillarious.

November 5, 2009

Well, we lost Maine, but what can you do to protect gay marriage for the future?

Filed under: Gay Marriage — Tags: , , — rollerbladerdc @ 2:12 am

So last night we ended up loosing out on Maine.  I was stuck traveling and with a huge delay so I wasn’t able to find out until my straight friend who lives in Portland Maine called me pissed off and furious.  Now, regardless if you are conservative or liberal, for gay or straight rights or even just don’t care, what happened in Maine is not acceptable.  Let me go over a few things from all ends.

1.  The equality groups in Maine allegidly and apparently did not spend their budgets fighting for gay marriage in Maine.  It’ll be interesting to see where their money is, was spent and who gets bonuses this year.  They probably did fight for it but gave up when the anti gay groups came in and flooded the tv and media with anti gay commercials, etc…

2.  When you have a huge group come in and run commercials to stop you from getting your law passed or running smear campaigns you fight them off.  My friend said they were running tv ads saying if you pass gay marriage the schools will have to teach about gay sex to your kids.  That is not true, they will teach safe sex, just like they are right now.  Classes will not have to change and your kids won’t have to see gay sex.  Then again, if you don’t want them exposed to sex, you shouldn’t be sending them to school anyways since they do teach sex in the schools.  The gay group should have ran tv ads combating this, but apparently they didn’t, they sat back and watched as gay people lost the right to marry in Maine.

3.  Most people don’t realize or didn’t realize that gays could get married in Maine since the gay groups and the HRC (who I hate and think should be closed down) never promote or make a media whirlwind about Maine.  Maine is gorgeous and has amazing places and beaches and foods and venues to get married at.  Maine should have ran commercials nationally and gotten a lot more coverage from the media to get married there.  This would not only have helped to increase the money coming into Maine, but it would have also helped create jobs in food service, hotel and other jobs for the people of Maine.  Then when it came time to vote on revoking the right for gays to get married in Maine, noone who was now employed and all the people who were making money and if the gay groups would have talked about how gay marriage was helping the economy in Maine, we probably wouldn’t have lost the right to marry in Maine.

Anyways, I can go on and on about what I think went wrong, but what we need to do is protect Iowa and other states that allow gay marriage and help everyone who lives there remember that gay marriage will not destroy their homes, it will help better them and help their ecomony.  When the smear campaigns start, start running your own. If you sit back and do nothing and don’t make it a priority to fight, then guess what, gays will loose their right to equal rights and to marry and we will be back to not having equal rights.  I don’t know if they stood back or if the HRC or anyone donated money, but from what I heard from my friends in Maine, apparently the gay groups didn’t do much and just sat back hoping for the best. If your state may pass gay marriage or may be voting on getting rid of it, you cannot site back and hope for the best, you need to take action and fight for gay marriage.  Don’t let Maine happen to your state.  Raise money and fight the groups that fight you.  Gay Marriage is about equal rights, not about the word or God.  Lets get Maine to allow gays to marry again and lets fight these groups that fight us.

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