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Should I Hire a Gay or a Straight Wedding Planner?

One thing that most people would expect a gay couple to do when hiring a wedding planner (If they aren't planning it on their own) is to always hire a gay wedding planner. Although I am all about supporting the gay community and GLBT companies, I do have to say that I don't agree with this one 100%. When you are getting married whether you are gay or straight, it is about the sexuality of your wedding planner that counts, it is about if they understand you and your needs so they can provide you with the perfect wedding.

For example, if the wedding planner has his or her own vision and doesn't want to listen to you or only tried to sell you on his or her ideas, then guess what, that wedding planner will not deliver what you had wanted and what your dream wedding is. If you love daisies and they love roses and you let them choose, guess what, you're stuck with roses instead of the flowers that you love and mean something to you. So lets go over what I would look for in a wedding planner instead of going off of them being gay or straight.

1. Does the wedding planner have experience with gay couples and gay weddings?
This is a key part of hiring a wedding planner for a gay wedding. If the wedding planner has not worked with a gay couple before, they may not realize the issues that sometimes arise with their normal vendors. Not all wedding vendors are gay friendly and it is better to have a wedding planner who remembers to talk to the vendors and their staff before the wedding to ensure they will provide amazing service to gay couples, are ok with working and being professional at a gay wedding and won't make a comment or cause a scene when the couple gets married. This is key as the wrong vendor who ends up being or has homophobic people on their staff can ruin your big day. Make a checklist of things for your planner to go over with their vendors to ensure there will be no issues with the vendors they choose so your big day is perfect for you and some jack*ss doesn't ruin it for you.

2. Does the wedding planner listen to you and share your vision?
Make sure your wedding planner doesn't sit there and just agree then come back with things other than what you requested. It is 100% ok for them to make suggestions, that is their job, but if they don't get what you are saying and ignore most of the things that you find important for your wedding, then you need to move on. Your wedding is exactly what it sounds like. Your Wedding. It is your big day and not the wedding planners. Most of us know what we like and don't like and we need to speak up and say that. If the wedding planner cannot combine your thoughts and ideas in with their thoughts and ideas then they cannot deliver the dream wedding and take your ideal dream wedding to the next level. Their job is to take what you like and want and then bring it to the next level and also make sure it goes off without a hitch. Don't back down on what you want, make them make it work and then bring it not only to life, but also go a step further with how to make it better.

3. Does your wedding planner understand budgets and have their own ideas?
Although these are technically separate issues, I wanted to bring them up at once. One important thing about hiring a wedding planner is that they are the expert in their field, otherwise you wouldn't be hiring them. A lot of times they will keep coming back to you asking for budget increases. Although these can be legit requests, make sure you put your foot down at a certain point because they had a budget and agreed to it. They knew the scope of the project and unless you keep changing your mind they agreed to make your dream wedding work under those budget constraints. You also have to remember that you hired them based on their experience and creativity. Their job is not only to stay on budget or below, but also to throw more ideas your way.

If they aren't coming at you with more and more ideas or even making an effort to suggest new things and twists to your ideas, then why did you hire them? Sure it may have been because you didn't have time to plan the wedding yourself, but if it was just your ideas and you already had your dream wedding mapped out, by the time you meet with all of the vendors your wedding planner picked out, etc... you would have spent roughly the same amount of time planning it for yourself. If your wedding planner isn't coming back to you with ideas then ditch them. You can plan your own dream wedding yourself which is essentially what they are doing for you. Give them the ideas you want but make them add their own twists to it and then also make them bring their ideas to reality with your ideas for the base. Have them take your wedding to the next level. That is what their job is.

Those are the three biggest things I think about when looking at wedding planners. Have they worked with gay couples. Do they get your ideas and understand your needs and what you want and can they add their own thoughts and ideas to make yours even better. It doesn't matter if your wedding planner is straight or gay, it matter if they can put on the perfect wedding for you and your partner.